Listen up, soldier!

You wouldn’t leave your weapons dirty after combat, would you? The same rules apply to your pleasure artillery, because a neglected sex toy isn’t just gross, it’s pretty much a bacterial minefield waiting to detonate.

If you want to keep things safe, smooth, and sanitary, you’d better learn how to decontaminate your gear after every mission. Let’s break it down.

Step 1: Know Your Materials

Different materials, different rules of engagement. Here’s a quick debrief:

Silicone: The gold standard. Non-porous, easy to clean. Just soap and warm water will do the trick.

Glass, Metal, and Ceramic: Same deal. Warm water, mild soap. If they’re 100% pure, they can handle boiling water, too.

Jelly, Rubber, or PVC: More porous than your mom’s Tupperware. These need extra care and ideally, a condom over them every time.

ABS Plastic: Wipe it down with a toy cleaner or rubbing alcohol; just don’t submerge battery-powered ones.

Step 2: Cleaning Protocol

Soap & Water: Your everyday go-to. Warm water, fragrance-free soap, a solid scrub.

Boiling Water: For silicone, metal, or glass toys that can handle the heat. Three minutes submerged should neutralize any threats.

Toy Cleaner or Isopropyl Alcohol: Quick, efficient, and great for when you’re too lazy for the full wash. Our Gun Oil Shine is a rich, easy-apply foam that makes cleaning your toys a breeze, while the scent and pigment-free formula ensures your toys stay pure and pristine

Dishwasher (Yes, really): Some non-motorized, high-heat-resistant toys can handle a dishwasher cycle. Just… maybe don’t mix it with your coffee mugs.

Step 3: Storage and Maintenance

Dry completely before storing. Mold is the enemy.

Keep them in separate bags/containers, cross-contamination is not a joke.

If a toy gets damaged or starts smelling like last month’s bad decisions, retire it with honor.

Treat your gear right, and it’ll always be combat-ready when you need it. Now, go forth and play responsibly.